The hardest question.

As a teacher, the hardest question from students  would be "kenapa nama saya tiada bin/binti teacher?"

And there I was, standing blankly and staring those demanding eyes. Yes, he/she  insisted  on and begged for the answers to satisfy their itching curiosity. 

I tried to clear the lump in my throat before I parted my mouth to give the answers she/he had been waiting for. 

Then, I went with " why? where is this coming from? ", I tried so hard to ease the conversation, navigating my mind to find the loophole and tried to escape from this dire situation. 

“saya dah buat research, saya tahu status saya

And my mind went numb. I froze there for a few minutes. It was hard for me to drop the truth but I knew, I have to do it. 

Then, the long conversation started with "Saya minta maaf, saya..." 

While I explained few things especially the importance of knowing what are our locus of control are and how she/he mustn't dwell in the sad past, I saw, tears were streaming down her/his face. I knew at the moment, her/his wall was crumbling down and she has no one to help her and pick up the pieces. 

I consoled her/him, so I thought, as best as I could. We talked about a few other things and how she/he actually put things together before she realised the truth. It was really sad yet it did bring us together. 

When she/he excused herself/himself because it was the time for him/her to go home, she/he asked me whether she still can text or dm me if she ever feels lonely. 

And I said yes, not because I have to ; it's my obligation to support her.